Ever find yourself trying to score points during a conversation? Like there’s a trophy in it for the winner or something you can frame on your wall? Even worse is that overwhelming urge to get in ‘the last word’.

It’s a bizarre behaviour, and means we can miss out on the knowledge and positive experience we could’ve shared with the other person.

That sense of satisfaction I feel when scoring points is more wrapped up in my sense of ego than having a growth mindset. Yet, it’s a growth mindset that helps us to be better learners and thinkers. And if you’re reading this, then I can safely assume it’s something we both strive to be.

So the next time it feels like you’re chasing points, pause and ask yourself:

“Am I trying to have a conversation with this person or win a competition”? 

I find the very act of asking this question is enough to check myself and bring the discussion back to what it should be – an opportunity to share and learn.

So, give it a try and let me know if and how it makes a positive difference in your conversations.

Another useful tool for your Big Life Mindset toolbox.

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