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How to keep your cool and stay in charge
The next time you’re about to say something in a conversation that’s bordering on an argument – remember PBS.
I find that pause is a great way of giving your brain a little bit of time to process what you’ve heard. As sometimes we can misinterpret the information we’ve just received, especially if there’s a lot of emotion in the air.
Taking that brief time to pause is also a very effective (and passive) way of letting the speaker absorb what they’ve just said.
For example, there have definitely been times when I’ve said something in frustration or anger, and then realised that what I’ve said, isn’t actually what I’ve meant. When the listener paused and gave me time to process it, I’ve been able to use that time to retract or reword it so it aligns more with my thoughts.
Breathing is something that is easily forgotten in the heat of the moment. It’s amazing to see how quickly we can go from calm to engaged to venting in a short space of time. Anyone who has experienced or seen road rage will have some insight on this.
Taking that breath, especially if it’s a deep one, can make all the difference in your conversation.
Coupled with the pause, it allows you to gather your thoughts and strip the emotion away. There’s even the side benefit of visibly demonstrating your control of a situation which can be a calming factor for you and whoever you’re speaking with.
Now, it’s time to speak, and you’ve put yourself in a great position by pausing and then taking that breath. When you speak now, your brain has had more time to process what you’ve heard, and connect it with what you would actually like to say. You’ve increased the likelihood of getting it right and moving the conversation into a productive place. Great Stuff!!!
For more practical, everyday tips to having better conversations, check out these Big Life Mindset resources:
Stay cool out there folks 😎